Oh, The Narcissist Pantyhose Loving Crossdressers We Are
I was on Twitter the other day (a more frequent occurence now) and had a look at a long lost tweet I had saved a while back…
https://twitter.com/WTFCrazyLaws/status/351320491564351489
I retweeted and saved it for a reason. I pondered in those very words a bit and I couldn’t help but to think that this was directed right at me. When you think about it, though, isn’t it directed at likely a majority of hot blooded crossdressers, transvestites and other “T’s” out there?
Yes, those of you who can’t pry themselves from the mirror dreaming that you’re either some kind of pantyhose model goddess or high-priced glamour hooker whose phone won’t stop ringing (my hand raised too). I’m fairly confident there is a huge narcissistic component to our feminine alter-egos that probably just comes with the territory.
I seriously doubt that this means we have narcissistic personalities. Personally, I like to consider myself a polite and considerate person in my normal life. Plus, I’ve conversed with many crossdressers and transvestites who are lovely people. This, of course, doesn’t mean we’re all not narcissistic but maybe it’s the feminine fantasy, however, that takes us out of our own true selves.
And so makes us strive to be that perfect looking woman… whose legs look so sexy and hot in those pantyhose.
Why it didn’t even take me long to find examples of crossdresser narcissism here, here and here (quite the lovely examples I would have to admit). Queuing my own narcissism, I hate them all and am now working at the moment on painting the perfect face. Those bitches!
OK, well, back to that tweet… I do think it is absolutely true that I would find another crossdresser similar to myself very attractive. So attractive, in fact, that although a long-term relationship may be out of the question, a fling would definitely not. I’ll even go as far to say that it excites me more finding this “crossdressing me” than a woman, even if that woman was completely open and accepting to my behind-closed-doors feminine lifestyle.
Why there are many a day where I fantasize of another crossdresser with gorgeous legs and dozens of pairs of pantyhose in her collection, closet full of lingerie and wants nothing more than to choose something out for me and her. Then after, she really treats me like a woman in a wild passionate sexual adventure. I honestly can’t imagine a better scenario to where I would feel more feminine except to dabble into bisexuality.
So, my two cents based solely on my own experience, and perverted fantasies, is that the bi-curious (or bisexual) nature of crossdressers stems exactly from their own narcissism. Sure, there are statistics out there that say sexual preference doesn’t correlate to whether or not you have a pantyhose fetish, are a crossdresser, transvestite or whatever.
Yet, as much as I question those statistics, there are very little to go on as far as those who would consider themselves bi-curious or even bisexual. Obviously, some of us are completely heterosexual as not all of us has an attraction to a mirror-imaged crossdresser. The percentage that do have that “bi” attraction, however, has to be somewhat higher than the statistics want you to believe.
Wouldn’t you think?
I don’t think that there is any doubt that narcissism and crossdressing are closely linked. If it wasn’t for our narcissism we would probably be content just to look at others that we find attractive and sexually stimulating rather than recreating ourselves to conform as nearly as possible into that image! And since our transformations are based on what we find most attractive and stimulating it would make perfect sense that our ideal sexual partner would be a clone of ourselves. Let’s see; would that make us unisexual?
Lisa
Hi Sheery!
Been a while since I posted, so thought I’d “pop” by 😉
Very interesting article, though I personally don’t identify with having a particularly narcissistic nature.
I do believe that bisexuality is a very complex sexual orientation to have, it took me (no joke) around 35 years to come to terms and accept my own bisexuality and that’s having been married twice and also trying to identify as being totally gay during this time…
My fetish for pantyhose is pretty text book though, from what I have read anyway, but the cross-dressing is so closely intertwined with my gay fantasies that now the two are completely merged. For sure, if I were not married now, I would be getting dressed up every weekend, short clingy dress, high heels, low-denier pantyhose, silicon tits and long black wig with full makeup. I would be straight off out to the nearest gay bar with a handbag full of condoms of lube in search of a guy(s)!
The weird thing is though that in reality, I am totally attracted to women, I’ve only fallen in love with women, never had a crush or fallen in love with a guy and 99.9% of guys I am not attracted to at all. Yet, my sexual fantasy landscapes are totally homo-erotic. They predominantly involve me being totally dressed up and being dominated by at least three guys.
Therefore, my bisexuality is very asymmetrical, probably the best help I have had in reconciling my bisexuality is a book by Fritz Klein, “The Bisexual Option”. Klein goes way beyond Kinsey’s sexuality studies and presents the true complexity of being a bisexual.
During my period of trying to identify with being gay, this was 1996, I went out to the Gay Village (a large gay community of bars, pubs, nightclubs etc. in a big city where I grew up) and it was my contact with gay men that made me realise how different to them I was and indeed still am.
It has always fascinated me the difference between drag queens and cross-dressers (i.e., guys like me). My experience is that a drag queen gets no sexual pleasure at all from putting on women’s clothes, whereas for a cross-dresser the act of putting on women’s clothes is a totally sexually-charged experience. To be able to meet up with a like-minded guy like me would be a truly wonderful experience, I am convinced!
My predominant fetish is of course for pantyhose, but the fantasy of transforming totally into a woman and going out strutting my stuff is also a very powerful sexual fantasy.
Indeed, many, many years ago, there was a chain of “clinics”, run by a sex-change male=>female entrepreneur who offered the 4 hour experience of transforming totally into a woman. That was an incredible experience but is another story and one I will tell later, if you are interested!
Anyway, sorry for going on, it actually helps to get my thoughts out on in writing so thank you for your website. If only you lived nearer, I would dearly love to meet you in person.
With much affection and empathy,
M.
XXXXXX
Good to see you back PnP!
I think you have a real point in that, although we may see ourselves as gay or bisexual, it is in a way that is quite a bit different than how gay/bi is normally perceived. Particularly it’s the time when crossdressing and diving into the fetishes when it seems to “turn on” and the rest of the time, can seem strictly hetero with a preference only for women.
I think a gay/bi gravitation is quite a unique trait to a certain subset of crossdressers. Unfortunately, this is a guess at best and I haven’t seen much research on the subject. Until we know more, we can surely believe we’re not the only ones out there who find other crossdressing girlies attractive.
X Sheery