Pantyhose and painted toes

I can say without a doubt that my crossdressing has taken leaps and bounds since my first days experimenting in my sister’s tights as a sort of pre-pubescent indulgence in erotica or, as we all may know, the pantyhose fetish in it’s infancy.

Shaved legs, hell yeah. Whole body? Yep, that too.

Makeup… just now learning how to do up properly.

Wardrobe? Check, including the mandatory minis and fuck-me dress.

Heel collection: I realize how addicting that can get… and how much I drool over Louboutins.

Full public view, well, maybe that’s in the near future.

Despite my love of trying to bring out the inner woman in me, not to mention the sexual thrill it gives, I always seem to end up obsessing over my first real (non-human) true love: pantyhose. They are always my first item of attention when dressing and, even if being the only thing I have on, makes me feel more feminine than even the perfect makeup session (or those Louboutins). Well, OK, if I had those Louboutins over my pantyhosed feet, I think I would shoot my load on the ceiling.

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Cecilia de Rafael Libero seamless pantyhose
Image: Shapings.com

Stop paying attention for a second and, all of a sudden, you miss what gorgeous new products that will happily feed our never-ending pantyhose fetish. I’m usually always on the lookout for something new and sexy to drape my legs in. However, the glossy look has given way to matte opaque tights and leggings which women go crazy over these days. Not exactly great news if you’re the high-shine loving fetishist like I am.

Yet there are some new developments that have just caught my eye that I just can’t wait to get my legs in…

Cecilia de Rafael Libero Seamless Pantyhose

I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw these. Finally, the reincarnation of the Wolford Fatal Neon tights, albeit a very sheer 15 denier as opposed to the 40 denier of the Fatal Neon. Of course there was a previous attempt at a revival with the Krystelle 30 seamless which didn’t quite live up to expectations. The CdR, however, looks promising and just look at that shine!

Not too long ago, I may have balked at the sheerness but, now that I shave my legs regularly, the Libero will be a welcome addition to the collection. Likewise, if you’re still sporting the gorilla legs, the Libero should unquestionably be given a pass. That or keep the legs out of public view (please).

Note that these are so new that they haven’t been manufactured yet. They are due out sometime in December so have your legs nicely shaved and ready (please).

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Fuscia Dim slippers and black pantyhose

I said it before but I’ll say it once again. Yep, I’m still in the closet, safely locked away and with the key still hanging on a nail in the garage. So that part hasn’t changed from a while back. That doesn’t mean, however, that I wouldn’t find it exciting if I happened to be caught in my bra and pantyhose putting mascara on my lashes. It would just make me a bit uneasy to handle the consequences of such an occurrence, despite being in a sexy exhibitionist sort of way.

After all, I am famous and have paparazzi camped out outside of my headquarters. OK, maybe not but replace the pappo with my friends and family would be just the same anyway.

That doesn’t mean that I don’t display my femininity at all. I absolutely love doing so but in more covert terms. Actually, I like to make it more of a game of Can You Tell I’m a Crossdresser? If you correctly guess, I might give that fact away (if you’re, say, a cute crossdresser) or I may not (if you’re my sister). Maybe I’ll just keep you guessing like a sophisticated woman would which could’t be more feminine. Am I right?

But I’ll let you in on my little clues…

Shaved Legs

This has been a more recent thing for me but has now become an actual necessity. Silky smooth legs are oh so sexy and no more having bear witness to that gorilla hair visibly smushed up against my pantyhose. Ewww!

Luck has it that there’s nothing to really even hide by doing this since it has become (somewhat) mainstream being a practice by male athletes and especially bikers. I actually tell everyone that my runner’s legs are more aerodynamic and far cooler without leg hair. Then I jokingly tell them they are sexier too. Oh, if they only knew…

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Capezio tights and strappy heels

I just got a new bustier yesterday which I happily slipped into and am prancing in at the moment on this dark, cold rainy day (no, not the picture above but I’ll have one soon!). It has quite a a lot  of padding giving me the illusion of having real boobs which I quite like. I would have liked to throw on a sweatshirt or something and take a stroll around on a sunny to see if anyone takes notice of my new “anatomy.”

But we have that rain thing… cancelled until further notice.

So I decide to spend my indoor-only day taking some transgender tests I found rather curiously online. Don’t ask why but I just decided it wasn’t worthwhile to do the usual fun chores of cleaning and laundry. You may call it doing a little soul searching or maybe you could say I just want someone (or in this case something) to tell me “hey, you’re quite the ladyboy there.”

After all, I do like a little feminine reassurance on occasion 😉

Keep in mind that, personally, I just take the following tests for what they are: Sunday comics. In other words, the results may tell you what you already know of your level of “trans” or maybe even offer insight if you don’t. These tests, however, don’t take into account the multi-faceted world of sexuality in 2015 and are not a definitive guide of where you sit on the totem pole of transvestism or transsexualism. So take them with a grain of salt my dear ladies.

COGIATI

I had previously written about the Combined Gender Identity and Transsexuality Inventory and was curious about the result taking it a third time. I went from 108 to -75 to -133 which has me moving from Androgyne to the more masculine Feminine Male category. I was utterly offended since it has just been two weekends in a row where I shaved my legs, a first for me. Take that COGIATI, you bitch.

Have a go at the COGIATI

Gender Traits Test (A.K.A. The Bem Test)

I wouldn’t say it is quite as interesting as the COGIATI but it is a quick survey of varied characteristics and how you see yourself with each characteristic on a scale of 1 (never) to 7 (always). Definitely not high on the validity scale and kind of like being “diagnosed” by that cook at the IHOP.

Take the Bem Test (WARNING: you need some paper and a pen to add up scores)

Open Sex Role Inventory

Basically the above test or, as they put it:

This is an interactive version of the Open Sex Role Inventory, a measure of masculinity and femininity modelled on the Bem Sex Role Inventory.

You [sic] use of this assessment should be for educational or entertainment purposes only.

You see, interactive and for entertainment purposes. How can you go wrong?

Take the Open Sex Role Inventory

Klein Sexual Orientation Grid Quiz

This test is based on a study by Fritz Klein to test his theory that sexual orientation is a dynamic, multi-variable process. Klein believed that an individual’s sexual orientation was composed of sexual and non-sexual variables which differed over time. Personally, I find the theory quite fascinating (maybe fodder for a future blog post/discussion) and test results what I could have already guessed.

Klein Sexual Orientation Grid Quiz

Multidimensional Scale of Sexuality Quiz

Considered an extension of the Klein quiz to measure sexual identity, I had a couple issues with it but, hell, took it anyway due to my topic interest. First, it’s not true/false but mark all answers that are true for yourself. This is very unlikely to reveal anything meaningful. Second, all the questions are long and fairly similar which will lead to a burnout midway through it.

That said, maybe you want one last “opinion.” Try out the quiz.

Victorias Secret camisole and Wolford tights

I seem to be doing a lot of thinking when it comes to slipping into my silken garments and looking at that bright shade of lipstick in the mirror. Oh, the philosophies of life as a crossdresser, way outside the norm, never boring and always making me question myself. Without regrets of course!

Since there is no official day of the crossdresser, that I’m aware of anyway, I’d like to dedicate this to the little vices that are appreciated, solely by us and only by us. OK maybe not all, but if you ever donned panties for twenty years and don’t have a vagina, then you’ll know what I mean.

Favorite Color

Sure, your favorite color as He-Man you may be blue or black but the girly side craves another shade. Am I right or is it just me? Pinks, pastels and anything prefixed with “baby” all of a sudden become a part of your world (and maybe those twenty-year-old panties). Call it our society’s labels with masculine and feminine colors but I just happen to love fuscia on everything from nail polish to my lace teddy.

For some reason, pantyhose “suntan” seems to resonate with me as well. Not totally feminine but could be just a crossdresser thing?

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Sheery in a Wolford Stocking Belt

It’s not news that I’m a lover of Wolford, especially my beloved Neon 40. There’s nothing like draping your legs in pure pantyhose perfection, paying a small fortune to do it and then feel like the queen you always dreamed of being. I have six pairs now that get use on those special occasions and make me 100% happy to be a crossdresser.

If you ever looked around the Wolford Boutique, away from the Neon 40 page, though, those perfect models showcasing the Wolford line of luxury lingerie are quick to grab your eye. Personally, I’m left wondering how that 100 EUR bra and 50 EUR panty would look paired with their luxurious hose. Then I default to the 20 EUR Wonderbra and 15 EUR matching thong panty and use the savings on an alcoholic binge.

One particular item caught my eye, however, which was the Satin Deluxe Stocking Belt which was strange because I don’t really have a thing for garter belts or stockings. Sure, I’d be open to wearing them and, of course, they turn me on like they would seeing them on another sexy crossdresser. I just don’t currently have stockings or a garter belt and haven’t tried one on since I was maybe eighteen years old. Nope, take that back, I do have those black stockings from when I was eighteen. How time flies…

So what the fuck, I got the belt and some stockings to match. Since I’m a lover of suntan pantyhose, I got the belt in a more flesh tone color, cosmetic, and managed to score some Wolford Neon hold-up stockings in a suntan color (Gobi). Note that instead of the Wolford Boutique, I purchased the stocking belt on eBay, where I found a much better price. The stockings were a different story, however, since they were discontinued. You only live once though, right?

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Sheery in Elly 40 pantyhose and a teddy

It’s not news that I have constant fantasies of other crossdressers (or anyone of the “T” variety really) who like to doll themselves up in silky pantyhose and later make a meal out of me. I can’t think of a way to feel more womanly that to be violated on both ends then swallowing that hot creamed oyster for dessert. Being a woman is the name of the crossdresser game when all is said and done, right?

Yet I never cease to wonder after such a passionate sexual encounter, what kind of emotional attachment would result. Mutual kissing, sucking, sex or even just rubbing my pantyhosed toes down a CD lover’s smooth nyloned legs results in an intimacy that I would believe difficult to leave behind after a single fling. Add to that the fact that we as humans are drawn to pleasure and we’ll seek it where we know we can get it. If a fling turned out that lusty sex of my dreams, I sure as hell would want more.

Ok, so maybe in the past I haven’t had quite the sexy fantasy-in-lace experience I had hoped for. It was more of a man-in-tights going at it with the experienced transvestite and, no, I wasn’t the transvestite. I have to chalk that up to lack of experience, much like the first time having sex with that genetic girl. I guess you can say that the cock/rear access complicated things a bit since I had been used to a vagina in all the years prior.

Then there is that fucking label. Am I bisexual now? Oh shit, I can’t say I’m hetero any longer. What’s a queer little crossdresser to do?

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Sheery the Crossdresser

Dear Mrs. Rainwater,

I’ve always been very curious when recalling my path leading up to becoming a crossdresser (and likely a future transvestite roaming the streets). It all seems to trace back to you as my teacher in my very first year of school when I was just five years old at the time. Actually those memories of you are still quite vivid in my mind.

I remember you would always wear those blue tights with sandals that would let those glorious hosed feet show. On those days, I would obsess over those gorgeous blue legs adding to the innocent boyhood crush I had on you. Of course, how could I forget, there was that one day where you lined up me and all of the other students and gave each one of us a big kiss on the cheek in appreciation of having us as students.

I’m sure you’re aware that doing that today would send you right to jail. However, I took it for what you intended it to be: reaffirming that crush I had on you was the real thing, even though I was five.

Since then, I wanted to be just like you, starting with the tights.

I became so obsessed with tights, that is, starting with the pairs I stole from my sister, who was catching on to my love for them. Then one day, I scrounged up my allowance money to buy my own pair of L’Eggs Sheer Energy pantyhose in an off-black color. My very own shiny, sensual, nylon-covered legs gave me such a thrill, almost as much as that smooch you laid on me years before.

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Nothing on but pantyhose and heels

Part IV: Wish Fulfillment

Part III: Reality

Part II: Happier Hour

Part I: Happy Hour

Part V: Acquired Tastes

Jim and Dave were each admiring to themselves the beauty that was before them. Yet they had no idea that underneath that well dolled-up woman named Carla, standing in front of them, was a crossdresser forced by his own wife to act out his fetish in pantyhose, lingerie and a sexy dress and heels. And now in front of other people or, better yet, men who Carla could tell were ogling her with their eyes.

Yet, despite the terrorizing fear she had of being outed, not only by Amy, she was almost equally excited bathed in the silky tightness of her lingerie, hearing her pantyhose rustle and knowing full well that she achieved the status of a passable woman.

After handing Carla, Jim and Dave their screwdrivers, Amy returned to the kitchen and prepared the dinner. Meanwhile, the other three began sipping their screwdrivers and their chit-chat. Carla continued in her feminine voice as before since it had done her well up to this point.

“So, what do you do Carla?” Dave asked.

“I’m a stylist,” she replied, obviously a lie.

The conversation continued with the usual boring get-to-know dribble when Amy came out from the kitchen and pulled Carla back into it, tugging on her dress.

“You’re going to do exactly as I tell you from now on,” Amy whispered angrily to Carla. “If not, I tell everyone at your job, your family, EVERYONE about your little girly crossdressing side,” she continued, pushing Carla back toward the dining area.

“Ok,” was all that Carla could mutter.

“Oh, and I won’t skip the the part about those tranny sluts Chelsea and Jenna,” Amy added as Carla was leaving the kitchen.

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Satin Teddy and Wolford Pantyhose

I’d have to say that between today and five years ago, I’ve grown quite a bit as a woman (OK, a wannabe but still). Boys are calling me (albeit feminized ones), I wear a bra around all the time and I do things like shave my legs and put makeup on routinely… like a chore. You know what though? I get my kicks out of feeling like and being a (wannabe) woman and here are my top ten reasons why.

Not that I need them of course. Bitch.

10. I seem to be enjoying pruning the hedges more.

9. 5 o’ clock shadow refers now to legs these days…

8. Which, coincidentally, is also referred to “black pantyhose day.”

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